View Plans & Pricing

If you are signed in and are seeing this message, please be sure you have selected a user name in My Profile. The forum requires it.
A A A
Search

— Forum Scope —




— Match —





— Forum Options —





Minimum search word length is 3 characters - maximum search word length is 84 characters

Topic Rating: 1 Topic Rating: 1 Topic Rating: 1 Topic Rating: 1 Topic Rating: 1 Topic Rating: 1 (31 votes) 
sp_TopicIcon
You know you're a poker player when....
emufart
Guest
Guests
1
December 6, 2011 - 2:46 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
1

You start chip-shuffling $2 coins together while waiting to pay for your energy drink at the diary.

emufart
Guest
Guests
2
December 6, 2011 - 2:52 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
1

After your girlfriend gives you a handjob, you say “nh”

bennymacca
Adelaide Australia
Road Gambling with Doyle
Members
Forum Posts: 2616
Member Since:
October 6, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
3
December 6, 2011 - 4:30 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
1

you date fat chicks to balance your range

 

 

badabing78
Guest
Guests
4
December 6, 2011 - 5:58 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
1

you watch more videos on tpe than on youporn

Avatar
RonFezBuddy
New York City

TPE Management
Forum Posts: 2313
Member Since:
March 17, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
5
December 6, 2011 - 7:02 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

You get excited when you see the letters AK, AA or KK together, and capitalized in everyday life.

bigheaddave
Guest
Guests
6
December 7, 2011 - 5:00 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

you start calling your sisters new boyfriend “all in” instead of allin

hapetimes
Guest
Guests
7
December 7, 2011 - 8:24 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
1

when your friend tells you someones 'dead' you immediately think he has no outs

emufart
Guest
Guests
8
December 8, 2011 - 10:01 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

you wear sunglasses and a hoody to the dinner table

chip chimp71
Guest
Guests
9
December 9, 2011 - 1:28 am
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

You triple range merge your stock portfolio to confuse and beat the S&P 500!

G0liath
Guest
Guests
10
December 9, 2011 - 1:39 am
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

You don’t get angry anymore, you go on ‘life tilt’

hapetimes
Guest
Guests
11
December 12, 2011 - 4:02 am
sp_Permalink sp_Print
1

When your daughters friend says she went to see the magician you picture antonio esfandiari

cousteer
Guest
Guests
12
December 12, 2011 - 7:30 am
sp_Permalink sp_Print sp_EditHistory
0

Badabing….. tpe vids or youporn…. It’s still good to flop the nuts!

Avatar
praetor
Madness
High Stakes Mario Kart Propping
Members
Forum Posts: 1033
Member Since:
June 22, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
13
January 3, 2012 - 2:34 am
sp_Permalink sp_Print sp_EditHistory
1

“Black Friday” is not the day after Thanksgiving.

"Your either in Sheen's Korner or your with the trolls."

Investpro
Guest
Guests
14
January 8, 2012 - 8:24 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

when cooking a pizza you time in levels

Bytie_nl
Guest
Guests
15
January 9, 2012 - 2:54 am
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

If, after just waking up, you are firing up the TPE forum right after you made coffee..

In case you are firing it up before that, I'd say you are at the verge of being a maniacal nut, having only one out: the psychiatrical ward… I mean you CAN exaggerate right!

Not even making an exception for RonFezBuddy here lol!

swet1
Guest
Guests
16
January 9, 2012 - 11:21 am
sp_Permalink sp_Print
1

You practice 'bluffing' on your wife

Avatar
RonFezBuddy
New York City

TPE Management
Forum Posts: 2313
Member Since:
March 17, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
17
January 9, 2012 - 12:19 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

lol i love this thread

MartinAltman
Guest
Guests
18
January 9, 2012 - 12:59 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print sp_EditHistory
0
 you don't have a sex with your girlfriend, but instead you're pushing it into her.
Avatar
praetor
Madness
High Stakes Mario Kart Propping
Members
Forum Posts: 1033
Member Since:
June 22, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
19
January 9, 2012 - 1:21 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

When you catch someone in a lie you say “I call”.

 

When you do something stupid your wife, kid girlfriend, etc tell you that you are such a donk.

"Your either in Sheen's Korner or your with the trolls."

emufart
Guest
Guests
20
January 9, 2012 - 5:13 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

When you quote Rounders in everyday life.

isaacjames
Guest
Guests
21
January 10, 2012 - 3:35 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

LOOOOL awesome.

isaacjames
Guest
Guests
22
January 19, 2012 - 12:34 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

You “Date fat chicks to Balance your range” *

 

*copyright Bunner from 2+2 Pokercast

Avatar
Killingbird
Cary, NC

TPE Management
Forum Posts: 4582
Member Since:
April 6, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
23
January 19, 2012 - 2:14 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
1

anytime anything unfortunate happens to you your son tells you “dad, you run sooooo bad”.

Avatar
praetor
Madness
High Stakes Mario Kart Propping
Members
Forum Posts: 1033
Member Since:
June 22, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
24
January 19, 2012 - 3:53 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
1

You actually know who Phil Hellmuh is. LOL

"Your either in Sheen's Korner or your with the trolls."

bennymacca
Adelaide Australia
Road Gambling with Doyle
Members
Forum Posts: 2616
Member Since:
October 6, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
25
January 19, 2012 - 4:01 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

last night i was doing group personal training at the gym, and we were talking about how PT is great because you get pushed a lot harder than what you would otherwise push yourself, and i said, yeah you would have to be a sicko to push that hard by yourself, they didn't really get it

Donskey
Guest
Guests
26
January 19, 2012 - 7:42 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print sp_EditHistory
0

you're paying for goods with change, you stack em up in piles and push them towards the cashier.

Moizt
Guest
Guests
27
January 19, 2012 - 8:06 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print sp_EditHistory
0

The only currency you're aware of is the amount of buyins you're spending on something.

 

Just something I tend to do

Donskey
Guest
Guests
28
January 19, 2012 - 8:12 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

You’re fed up of repairing, buying parts or even buying  a new computer (they were never designed to
be thrown across the room) that you keep your computer in a  “Indestructible, impenetrable,  inaccessible, impermeable,
super high tensile, extra strength reinforced  toughened titanium steel cage while you're playing”

isaacjames
Guest
Guests
29
January 19, 2012 - 9:37 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
1

calculate the odds of getting a parking ticket vs. the cost of parking and make a decision to park in a no parking zone because it's +EV in the long run

bennymacca
Adelaide Australia
Road Gambling with Doyle
Members
Forum Posts: 2616
Member Since:
October 6, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
30
January 19, 2012 - 9:58 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

i am an electronic engineer so i make ok money, but i once calculated the equity of switching to become a teacher because teachers get 10 weeks of holidays a year that i could spend grinding. 

 

at my current hourly it wouldn't be worth it, but assuming i got better with increased volume, it prolly will be. pity i have a wife and a mortgage otherwise i prolly would go back to uni for a while 😀

rivermen123
Guest
Guests
31
January 31, 2012 - 12:15 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

Donskey said:

you're paying for goods with change, you stack em up in piles and push them towards the cashier.

I did this at the gas station last week and started laughing at myself. Probably looked pretty ridiculous.

0lespaul3
Guest
Guests
32
January 31, 2012 - 12:28 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

When you wake up and review you tournaments from the night before, BEFORE!!!you even say hi to your spouse.

you start your nightly tourneys on your laptop on the 35min ride home from work

your checking your rankings on the iphone (w/otterbox), while in the shower

u set alarm reminders on your phone stating..(focus, patience,discipline,controlled agression, WIN!)

LOL these are just a FEW of mine!! great thread!

 

terbet11
Guest
Guests
33
March 3, 2012 - 12:15 am
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

Actually dreaming of hands played, and talking to yourself about certain hands the night prior you screwed up on while your wife stares at you like you have serious problems. Lol. Great thread guys.

JLUDEOBV
Guest
Guests
34
March 3, 2012 - 12:30 am
sp_Permalink sp_Print
1

Your significant other asks you what your favorite position is and you reply with, “the button.”

I3betshove
Guest
Guests
35
March 6, 2012 - 10:42 am
sp_Permalink sp_Print sp_EditHistory
0

You ask your wife if she wants to play “Stuffy Baker”! laugh

And then you give her the old “Showski and Hutch”! haha

Avatar
RonFezBuddy
New York City

TPE Management
Forum Posts: 2313
Member Since:
March 17, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
36
March 6, 2012 - 11:35 am
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

JLUDEOBV said:

Your significant other asks you what your favorite position is and you reply with, “the button.”

lololol

terbet11
Balla
Members
Forum Posts: 326
Member Since:
May 30, 2012
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
37
June 30, 2012 - 3:04 am
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

you reply “standard” to anyone describing something that didn't work out for them, where they look at you confused….you immediately think to yourself “does that place have wifi” when you are told you are going on a road trip….you yell out “bink” when something good happens….you let your friends know whether they are in +/-ev spots in everyday life situations, where again they look at you confused….you can't look at your watch/phone to see what time it is, and not help know what tourney is about to fire up and whether you can get home to fire up for late reg….

hawkeyeK9
Guest
Guests
38
June 30, 2012 - 4:26 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

hahahahaha! Never noticed this thread before.

1Uwant2bdaddy1
Flounder
Forum Posts: 7
Member Since:
July 2, 2012
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
39
July 24, 2012 - 12:26 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

bennymacca said:

you date fat chicks to balance your range

 

ROFLMFAO!

Avatar
usedstars
Australia
Nose Bleed Member
Members
Forum Posts: 462
Member Since:
July 10, 2012
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
40
July 24, 2012 - 3:33 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

You prefer to do your gardening rakefree.

 

Great thread guys. Loved the 'favourite position' one. smile

duggs
nz
Playing The Prelims
Members
Forum Posts: 591
Member Since:
May 30, 2012
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
41
July 24, 2012 - 5:16 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

you refer to sex as binking, 

 

you grind through an earthquake whilst everyone else is heading for doorways

Muttley66
Playing Freerolls
Members
Forum Posts: 20
Member Since:
October 9, 2012
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
42
November 26, 2012 - 10:53 am
sp_Permalink sp_Print sp_EditHistory
0

I3betshove said:

You ask your wife if she wants to play “Stuffy Baker”! laugh

And then you give her the old “Showski and Hutch”! haha

Is it true that you now “own” the patent to the phrase “stuffy baker” .. If so ..BigDog won't be happy !frown

He'll be even less happy when he finds out i've just succesfully filed a patent for the phrase “Showski and Hutch” yell

If you wish to continue using this phrase you will have to forward me the appropriate royalties.

On this occasion, as i have used your patented phrase in my reply, i reckon they should cancel each other out.laugh

For your information, my patent number is ” LOLROFLMFAO”

Thanks

Muttley66

Will Ramirez
Lighting Money On Fire
Members
Forum Posts: 21
Member Since:
November 12, 2012
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
43
November 27, 2012 - 1:24 am
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

When your 8yr old neice gets something she wants, she says ship it.

Absolutely love this thread!

Zhengix_Khaan
Grinding Micros
Members
Forum Posts: 59
Member Since:
January 24, 2013
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
44
February 1, 2013 - 10:00 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

when your divorce attorney cross examines your ex wife at a mediation and makes her divulge damaging information about things she had no idea you knew.

 

then you turn to your attorney and say, “You just SOUL OWNED that DONK!”

 

Nqon
High Stakes Shark
Members
Forum Posts: 198
Member Since:
November 30, 2012
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
45
February 2, 2013 - 2:43 am
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

When you refer to getting rejected at bars to running bad.

Check out my "going pro" poker journal, updated weekly with wins, losses and my progress as a player:

Click here

Zhengix_Khaan
Grinding Micros
Members
Forum Posts: 59
Member Since:
January 24, 2013
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
46
February 2, 2013 - 9:19 am
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

you and your friends openly tell the world youre railing another guy on twitter….

bennymacca
Adelaide Australia
Road Gambling with Doyle
Members
Forum Posts: 2616
Member Since:
October 6, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
47
June 25, 2013 - 7:00 am
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

you are beginning to like the rock version of the katy perry song, even though you heard it 3 times today at the end of the TPE live podcast

EllDan
Wilkes-Barre, Pa
Midstakes Master
Members
Forum Posts: 125
Member Since:
January 27, 2013
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
48
August 15, 2013 - 10:26 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

Instead of your kids saying “Good Night”, they say “Run Good Daddy”.

 

Your wife nolonger complains about the gatorade bottle on the floor next to the computer.

Avatar
Killingbird
Cary, NC

TPE Management
Forum Posts: 4582
Member Since:
April 6, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
49
August 15, 2013 - 10:55 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

lol.  those are both gold.  I think I need to publish a bunch of these as an article on the site…so keep em coming!!

bennymacca
Adelaide Australia
Road Gambling with Doyle
Members
Forum Posts: 2616
Member Since:
October 6, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
50
August 15, 2013 - 11:13 pm
sp_Permalink sp_Print
0

I was talking to a friend the other day about how i was bartering with a shop keeper, and he gave me a really good deal so i snap-called, they didnt get it.

Forum Timezone: America/New_York

Most Users Ever Online: 2780

Currently Online:
29 Guest(s)

Currently Browsing this Page:
1 Guest(s)

Top Posters:

bennymacca: 2616

Foucault: 2067

folding_aces_pre_yo: 1133

praetor: 1033

theginger45: 924

P-aire 146: 832

Turbulence: 768

The Riceman: 731

duggs: 591

florianm1: 588

Newest Members:

sdmathis89

ne0x00

adrianvaida2525

Anteeater

Laggro

Philbro

Forum Stats:

Groups: 4

Forums: 24

Topics: 12705

Posts: 75003

 

Member Stats:

Guest Posters: 1063

Members: 12007

Moderators: 2

Admins: 5

Administrators: RonFezBuddy, Killingbird, Tournament Poker Edge Staff, ttwist, Carlos

Moderators: sitelock, sitelock_1