Last wenesday i made a really deep run in mini ftops 1. It  started with 15328 people and i managed to grind me way through the tourny getting knocked out in 46. Man did that suck. To have such a deep run and really make nothing out of it. Yes of course just making that run was great, but when i look at the time spent, gettin knocked out a 5:30 in the morning to have to work at 10… it kind of sucks. So coming off of that deep run i played the 109 last night. Again I find my self deep in another tourny. With the tourny starting with 3803 people, I was hoping for some good results when I found myself still in with 30 people left. But again, I ran really bad deep in a tourny. I got my money in good with a8o against kqo. He hit his queen and i felt like crying. I was out in 20. I dont know how many of the yous have been that close to big scores like this…. 1st tourny was 46k and change and the 109 was 74k and change…. it blows the big one. I find my self thinkng about every hand i screwed up on and all the what ifs. I was so close that it almost feels like it was stolen from me. I feel like the one from last night will bother me for a bit… and I know that it shouldnt. So that why im kind of writing this depressing post. lol I never realized how much you could dwell on somthing like this. To me the money is huge. And I could use it ffor a lot of things. But also just winning it through an ftops event would be amazing.  I hope no one crys over this…lol and I wish everyone the best of luck in the up coming events and also a merry Christmas(or happy holidays) and hope everyone has a good new years.